The Logical Philosopher

Thursday, October 12, 2006

Four Blonds and a Playboy

Following up on my last post, another blond story, but this time it actually happened in front of me.

After picking up little LP from school today we decided, given the sunny weather, that there was time for a coke slurpee before heading home. As we walked into the 7-11 I asked him what he learned at preschool today. "You know, numbers and letters and stuff. The usual." he said nonchantly, waving his hand into the air as if he knew it all. Oh to be four...

His amusing comment, combined with the fact I was looking through my pockets to find some change for our drinks, had me momentarily distracted. Once inside little LP bolted to the left, hoping to get a head start towards what he thought was the candy section. Instead he headed down the row full of magazines, stopping directly behind four 18 year old blonds that were looking through the pages of a few adult magazines - Hustler, Swank and Playboy magazines to be exact.

"Oh, I think he'll like this one!" I heard the first one say.

"No way, not busty enough - check out the Hustler instead!" another retorted.

A third, not to be left out, chimed in on the pricing. "Man, these are expensive! I could get, like, three Homes & Gardens for one of these!"

The fourth one just stood and flipped the pages. By the look in her eyes I got the impression she was learning a few things. Yes, at that exact moment, I think she realized that she wasn't hanging with the Apple Dumpling Gang after all.

I steered him away from the (ahem) ladies, because given the options I was sure the right parental thing to do was to give my child candy, not a full view 7-11's available porn selection. I was waiting for the "what's that daddy?" line to come, but fortunately I didn't have to go there.

We collected our slurpees, paid and left, the four still arguing over which girly magazine to get for one of their guy friends.

As we got outside two things went through my mind:

1) When I was 18, what did my girl friends argue over getting me? I hope I was worthy of at least one Playboy argument. I'm no Tucker Max, but I can hope.

2) Given the choice between three Homes & Gardens, and one Playboy magazine, I hope they eventually went for quality, not quantity. Because sometimes it's nicer to see one quality bush than three overgrown ones.